Sex Before Marriage

Why can't a man and woman have sex outside of marriage if they truly love one another?

Answer: God has designed sex to be enjoyed only within the covenant of marriage. The biblical term for sex before marriage is called "fornication." "Adultery" is having sex with someone who is not your spouse. Hebrews 13:4 says, "Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge."

If you are involved sexually with someone who is not your spouse, God wants you to stop this activity. God will forgive you if you repent (stop doing it) and ask forgiveness from God, who can cleanse you through the blood of Jesus. Here are 6 reasons why you shouldn't have sex outside of marriage.
1. If you love God, you will obey His instructions. Jesus said, "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments." (John 14:15) If your highest commitment is to Jesus Christ, then you won't compromise your convictions in this area.

2. Sex seals the covenant of marriage. After you have committed yourself to your spouse in the wedding, sex is that which seals the covenant. If you truly love your future spouse, you will wait until after you have committed yourselves to each other in the marriage ceremony. Many engaged couples have made the mistake of having sex before marriage because they were "going to" get married. Then, when they break off their engagement, they deeply regret having been involved sexually. It is the marriage ceremony, not the engagement, which commits you to one another.

3. God designed sex to be enjoyed only within the covenant of marriage. God will not allow sex to fulfill you outside of His purposes. However, God will put His blessing upon sex within marriage.

4. Sex makes you "one flesh" with another person. "Or do you not know that the one who joins himself to a prostitute is one body with her? For He says, 'The two shall become one flesh'." (1 Cor. 6:16). When you have sex with someone, you become one flesh with him or her-bound psychologically to some degree.

5. The person who has sex with numerous people becomes a fragmented person. Like a bee that goes from flower to flower, the person that has sex with others leaves a little bit of himself with each person.

6. Keep yourself pure for your future husband or wife. I've never met one person who regretted keeping himself or herself pure until marriage, but I have talked to multitudes of people who have regretted losing their virginity before marriage. You will not regret keeping yourself pure for God and your future spouse. It doesn't matter how many of your friends are doing it, don't give in to their pressure. Only YOU will live with yourself for the rest of your life. Your "friends" will quickly be gone and could care less about what is best for you. Don't sacrifice your future on the altar of the present, which will soon be past.

If you have already had sex, God can forgive you! He loves you and is giving you a chance right now to start over. If you are not a Christian, please read "God's Plan of Salvation" on this Bible study page. It will show you how you can give your life to Jesus Christ. If you are a Christian but have had sex pray this:

"Heavenly Father, I'm sorry for having sex before I am married. I now realize how wrong it is! won't ever do it again. Please forgive me for having sex. Jesus, thank you for dying for ALL of my sins, including the sexual sins. I ask You to cleanse me and my conscience for the times I have done this. I will keep myself pure until You bring me my future spouse. Thank you for giving me a chance to start over! Amen."

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